The Fire of Transformation

It wasn’t even two years ago that I failed a simple 6-minute walking test with my physical therapist. A few weekends ago, I walked across fire. I’d wanted to experience this since I first learned that fire walks were a thing, but since I was having a hard enough time walking on the ground at the time, I didn’t think I’d ever actually do it.

It’s hard to appreciate how far you’ve come when you’ve been so long focused on getting to somewhere else. I didn’t even realize this myself until a friend pointed it out to me. Not only did I make it safely across a 6-foot long pit of 1100-degree coals, I signed up to attend a women’s retreat (by myself) that was centered around a fire walk–without giving a single thought to how I might lose my balance and tumble into the flames.

The fears that did arise had nothing to do with Lyme disease or disability. They were about looking foolish in front of other people.

  • What would people think about me for spending money on a retreat after I was just on the verge of bankruptcy?
  • What if this was some kind of gimmick? What if other people knew this and thought I was ridiculously naive for believing it was real?
  • Or, my loudest fear, what if this was real, and it works for everyone else except me and I get severely burned in front of a group of strangers?

One of the main reasons why people participate in fire walks is to prove to themselves that certain obstacles they’ve believed to be impassible may be merely illusions of the mind. The element of fire is a powerful teacher, bringing to light your subconscious patterns in facing the metaphorical “fire walks” in your life. Once you realize that fire doesn’t always have to burn you, you begin to wonder what other false (or only partially true) limitations may be holding you back.

The Fire of Transformation | A blog post from Jill of Ark

After returning from the trip and taking some time to process it, I came to another profound recognition:  those fears I listed about the fire walk were almost exactly the same fears I’d had about my recovery.

  • What would people think of me for cutting back on work and spending so much money on these elaborate treatments that half the medical profession seemed to doubt were necessary?
  • What if these treatments weren’t necessary and I was getting ripped off and looking stupid? I was already feeling humiliated enough to have to ask for financial help from family and friends.
  • What if these treatments were necessary, but they didn’t work for me because I somehow wasn’t capable of doing what it took to heal?

They were also uncannily similar to the fears I frequently come up against in doing this work.

  • What do people think of me for charging money for my services when my mission is supposed to be to help animals?
  • What if I really am making the messages up in my head and someone catches on and exposes me as a fraud?
  • What if this is real, but the reason I haven’t been more successful in growing my business is because I’m not good enough at it?

In fact, this pattern was present in almost everything I was doing or had done.

  • First I hesitate and hold back.
  • Then I do it, but I question the value or legitimacy of it.
  • Then I acknowledge the value, but still insist I’m not good enough to receive it or provide it.

The fire of transformation didn’t burn me, but it burned away many of these ill-serving doubts and fears after stripping them down to their essence. I was surrendering all my power based on what I thought people might think of me without having any proof that they were thinking that at all. (And, even if they were thinking that, it wasn’t really my business. It didn’t have to stop me from living my life. I can’t please everyone.)

So, yes, I can walk on fire. I did it three times to be sure.

Yes, I can also heal from Lyme. I’ve proven that I’m already well on my way.

That means it’s at least highly likely that I can communicate with animals, provide value, be fairly compensated for it, and commit to playing bigger.

It also means it’s very much possible that I CAN do many of the other things I’ve been convinced I probably can’t or shouldn’t.

And if I can, you can, too!


Over to you…

What fears and limiting beliefs are you ready to feed to the fire of transformation? Tell me in the comments.

P.S. – It goes without saying that fire absolutely does burn most of the time, so please do not try this without working with a certified fire walk instructor. In the interim, you can work with the element of fire by visualizing it purifying your energetic body and/or writing down what you wish to release or transform in your life and burning it (safely).


  • Jean Appel

    Reply Reply August 18, 2017

    Since I’ve met you I follow you on Facebook and follow your blogs. Just want to say I find you to be an amazing person, so very strong and insightful! I’ve told everyone about how you and Dan have helped me with me and my Pablo. Keep doing your wonderful work, you are truly an inspiration!

    • jillofark

      Reply Reply August 18, 2017

      Thanks so much, Jean! We’ve enjoyed working with you and Pablo and are glad he’s doing well. Hope to see you soon!

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